Monday, 14 April 2014

Inhale, exhale ~ 15/52

It's been pre-winter colds in our house this past week. And whenever that happens I'm so very conscious of how much I can't breathe. Breathing is such a big part of the meditation I do, and when my breath is short and struggling I feel it more than ever. By the sea this week was just a few minutes stopping here on our drive home. But it was enough time to inhale and exhale, and give thanks for being able to breathe big full beautiful breaths once again.


What are you most grateful for today?  

Wednesday, 9 April 2014

You ~ 14/52

It's been just the two of us for 15 hours a week for 10 weeks now.

My eyes on you, my heart taking all of you in. Your eyes brimming with excitement, your hand in mine.

And I've noticed...

You hold my hand tighter than usual when it's just the two of us.

When you show me that one-dimple smile, your eyes sparkle. I love it so very much.

You're even cheekier than your big sister. I never would have guessed my gentle baby would be. 

You have so many more words when it's just you and me. And you're not afraid to assert your intentions either. "I walk, no pram." Before the car is even parked...

You like your own company. Keen to explore for yourself. And create some distance between you and me.

You notice everything. So much so I find myself scrambling to make sure I'm noticing enough.

"Cup a tea?" you say as soon as we return home, picking up the teapot in your play kitchen.

And this past month, it's mummy you call me. I'm mama no more.

You're growing into a little girl, but still my baby. As you put it so sweetly to the mother and baby we met in the street, "Hi little baby! I big baby."

And I’m trying so hard to remember every part of you as you are at two and a half, trying so hard to remember these moments now forever. 

But mostly I find myself just focusing on the love, all that love. As you grow, I grow, and that love just keeps on surprising me and expanding even further too.


{Reflections after I took this photo last week ~ a beautifully sand-messy morning with just the two of us by the sea x} 

Friday, 4 April 2014

To soar

I walk outside to check the weather, and there are birds staring at me from the grass.

I look to the sky and a solo bird flies into the frame and sits directly in my view.

I step outside sleepily to watch the sun rise and birds are already perched on the fence and power lines singing their tunes.

And every time I see them I keep waiting for them to soar. You know the moment? When they move from still to up, up and away.  With purpose, with direction, with momentum, rhythm... with power and energy but with grace.

I keep waiting. And they keep on staying still. Fly, I think. Fly! Show me how you can soar.

Eventually I walk away. 

And eventually I come to the realisation that we don't need bold, dramatic or "something to talk about" action to soar. That we can soar immersed in stillness and in presence, in peace of mind and in heart. And sometimes without a word spoken, or written. Without a movement outward, but with expansiveness within.


{Soaring - how I soar, what I need to soar, to stay present, and to be the best me - has been on my mind this week, as has gratitude and the joy and presence that can come from creating a ritual that both honours and nourishes us. A lot to think about, and a lot I want to write and something I need to share... for another post soon! This week I feel most grateful for time - time alone and time together, and time to just be. Elisa x}

What are you most grateful for today? And what makes you soar?